John Cooper Clarke Quotes

I had a million jobs before I managed to make a living out of poetry.

It was a tedious saying among hippies: if you’re not part of the solution, you’re part of the problem. I was very much part of the problem.

By the ’80s, anything to do with punk was perceived as rancid. Me being known as the ‘punk poet’ meant my work and I plummeted.

You know how the Marvel Comics superheroes formed themselves into the Justice League of America – Batman, Flash and the rest. Why did Superman join? He never needed any help.

Where I grew up, the one unmistakable sign of homosexuality was to betray some interest in your appearance.

The first time I heard rock’n’roll on a big sound system would have been at a fairground at the seaside. That’s a hell of a sensory experience right there.

I’m not giving away sartorial secrets but the trousers I wear cost 19 quid.

I love singing. I’m a great singer.

When you write poetry you are always addressing the world somehow.

I’ve always lived all over the place, and left Manchester the minute I was old enough to steal a car.

I love the Arctic Monkeys!

I wish I could drive.

It took me 30 years for people to consider me an overnight success.

I quite like cooking, but not to the extent that I look on a kitchen as a domain.

There is a certain sentimental vibe in my home town of Manchester, which you would sort of expect.

I eat like a pig. Tripe is the only thing I won’t eat.

I don’t go looking for new fads.

I love talking about anything, except for myself.

I don’t have secrets, my life’s an open book.

Me, I listen to all kinds of music, really.

When the punk rock thing happened, I thought, ‘Right, I have one chance here to be seen as part of some wider social phenomenon.’

The very pointlessness of a sea walk is it’s attractiveness to me.

Most cities are the same.

I would describe my style of dress as careful.

Literally’ – I’m not having it; people can’t go around saying ‘literally.’ Otherwise, what’s literal? There’s not another word for literally: if it isn’t figurative or metaphorical, what is it? It’s literal: there’s no substitute.

I’ve never met a happy atheist.

Maybe there are luckier people than me, but I don’t know who that would be. I feel pretty lucky. I’ve had a nice life – I don’t know how I could be luckier.

My favourite writers are columnists.

The ’80s were a lost decade.

I love being on my bike, but I don’t consider that a sport: it’s too pleasant.

I write with pen and paper. I don’t have a mobile or computer, because I know how great they are. If I did, I’d never leave the house – you’d find me in six months, dead under a pile of pizza boxes.

Happiness is the target one only has to aim at in order to miss.

I’m not fond of crowds. I’m no jittery neurotic, but I don’t really want to be surrounded by a lot of people if I have a choice.

I’m a great reader of credits; I never leave the cinema before they finish.

I never saw a painting that would not be improved by the addition of tropical fish.

I’m not much of a team player when it comes to making records, I’ve got to say.

Find a poet whose style you like, emulate that style, then deal with things that you know about – don’t waste your time looking for your own style.’ I wish I could remember who told me that, because I’d like to congraulate him. I’ve emulated all the old guys – Tennyson, Alexander Pope.

My dad was an electrical engineer.

A much underrated garment, the jegging: they never need ironing and they hold their colour.

Being unapologetic means never having to say you’re sorry.

It amazes me there are movies about writers… such inert, uneventful lives.

I’ve got a speech impediment.

My declining allure is a source of great sadness to me.

I’d like to be rich, but without all the downside of fame.

I’ve been kept from honest employment for a long, long time now. Thank God!

I wanted to get rich, like anyone from my background.

Dutch food is terrible, I think. What sort of person starts the day with egg and cheese?

I’m not one of nature’s campers. I’m not even a glamper.

The only casual item I own is a Levi’s jacket.

To approach a poem as if it is a puzzle to be understood is to miss the point.

From social pariah to King of the World? It’s taken 45 years, so I’ve been able to adjust to it!

When I sit down to eat, the greatest spice of all is hunger.

There are only three things that stop me sleeping: hunger, the odd bad dream and cramp in the arches of my feet – it’s crippling, as if somebody’s trying to tie your foot in a reef knot.

I was too old to be a punk rocker. I was a mod, that’s really the only youth tribe I ever belonged to – and even then, not for very long.

There’ve been lots of positive changes in the city since I worked at Salford Tech in the seventies, and I’m pleased to be known as Salford’s Bard and to have helped put it on the map.

I crack myself up. Even I don’t know what I’m going to say next.

No one wants to be a source of anxiety to everybody they know.

Doris Day was the perfect woman.

You can always find something better to do than writing when you’re at home.

People who believe in God are happier than those who don’t.

Where’s the mileage in an autobiography? Anyone who writes one inevitably casts themselves as a hero, and I’m not about to do that.

Not everyone is prepared for fame, not even at the level I got it. One minute you’re just a face in the crowd, next minute everyone wants a piece of you.

I got to play The Vortex in London with the Buzzcocks, the Fall, me and Johnny Thunders And The Heartbreakers. That was a serious Manchester night.

I’m dead fussy about food: I don’t eat junk.

The greatest threat to any artist is surrounding themselves with people who love everything they do.

I’m a great believer in the capsule wardrobe – a wardrobe where’s there’s a limited palate of black colours.

The one thing I got right was that I already looked like a punk when punk arrived.

Well, I’ve obviously been a great source of inspiration to the academic population of Salford! They’re citing me as a major contribution to their upward trajectory!

If I’d have known how much fun fatherhood would be, I would have started way earlier than 45.

If you don’t like The Ramones, you don’t like rock ‘n’roll. They’re like The Beach Boys without the sea.