Screw Quotes

Here, we’ve compiled a list of the best Screw Quotes from famous authors such as Lionel Shriver, Bob Lemon, Connie Britton, Diablo Cody, Huey Lewis. Let’s look at these pieces of wisdom. We definitely have something to learn from them!

1
Dieting is odious and can require years of determination and sacrifice. I entirely understand the impulse to say, ‘Screw it,’ and have another piece of cake.
Lionel Shriver
2
Baseball was made for kids, and grown-ups only screw it up.
Bob Lemon
3
TV loves to bring in affairs – as soon as you have a relationship, let’s screw it up.
Connie Britton
4
To enjoy being famous, you need to have a screw loose.
Diablo Cody
5
I went to engineering school, I went to physics class. I said, ‘Screw this, I don’t want to be here. I’d much rather be at a club playing music.’
Huey Lewis
6
If I’m throwing a no-hitter and someone says, ‘Hey, you’ve got a no-hitter,’ obviously I’d be like, ‘Yeah, I know.’ I just try to be humble. I don’t like to talk about myself. I have no problem speaking up when I screw up, but if I’m doing good, people are going to notice. I don’t need to talk about it.
Stephen Gostkowski
7
Actors, I have to say, most of the time, they elevate things; they don’t screw things up most of the time.
Michael Douglas
8
Now, therefore, the Directors of the company are hereby ordered to see that precautions are taken to make travel on said railroad perfectly safe by using a screw with at least twenty-four inches diameter.
Joshua A. Norton
9
I hate performing on live television. It’s so scary, because, if you screw up, you don’t really get any retakes. So when I do television shows now, having been on ‘Idol’ really helps me mentally to just kind of take it all in. So I learned a lot from it.
Phillip Phillips
10
You try and learn from some people’s mistakes. But you have to really trust the people who are working for you because they make a lot of decisions that could either do well for you or really screw up your image.
Mitch Gaylord
11
My job is not to save ‘The Wheel of Time’, to fix ‘The Wheel of Time’, or anything like that. My job is not to screw it up.
Brandon Sanderson
12
Sometimes when something doesn’t go the way it should go, everyone blames the concept. Sometimes we screw up the way we implement it.
Charlie Baker
13
I want to keep doing as much work as I can, and I want to keep the level high. I’m wondering if something is going to happen to me to screw it up.
Harvey Pekar
14
Regardless of what you feel about Obama and his politics – screw all that. The fact of the matter is, he was the first black guy to be the president of the United States. The history is still being made.
Ed Dwight
15
There’s a gray area between Conservative and Orthodox people, for whom you don’t screw around with the mezuzah, you don’t mess with the holy melodies.
Rick Moranis
16
If you really screw up, send roses.
Letitia Baldrige
17
There is always a reverence issue, and I’m no different from any audience member that if someone’s adapting a book or comic that I like, I really don’t want them to screw it up.
Jane Goldman
18
We need to accept that we won’t always make the right decisions, that we’ll screw up royally sometimes – understanding that failure is not the opposite of success, it’s part of success.
Arianna Huffington
19
Good luck happens to people who work hard for it. Sometimes people just fall into the honey pot, but I’ve consistently strived to create whatever good fortune I can get in my life – and consistently strive just as hard not to screw it up once I have it!
Patrick Duffy
20
Whenever you make a movie, when it’s done, as a filmmaker, you never sit there and say, ‘Boy, I really got that right.’ It’s, ‘Where did I screw up?’
Rod Lurie
21
Stage is much more intimidating than going before the cameras, because you can really screw up, and can’t do a retake.
Daniel Radcliffe
22
I’m always the last person they go to with a sequel, because I’m the most skeptical. You know, I’m very proud of what we’ve done, and I don’t want to screw up our series.
Sigourney Weaver
23
I think the reason why a lot of young people are such screw ups… is oftentimes they didn’t have the luxury I had of forming important relationships and opinions and life experiences before having success.
George Clooney
24
They’re guys who want to screw around all the time, which interests me not at all. God knows we’ve done that, been there, and we don’t want to do that any more.
Lauren Bacall
25
If you start the day miserable, nobody else can screw up your day.
Jake Roberts
26
I love that as a theme for women: Stop standing by! You’ve got to make stuff happen! You’ve got to create your own world because if you let other people do it, they’re going to just screw you.
Melissa Rosenberg
27
I’ve got this weird thing where I screw my face up. I don’t know what it is, but I do it a lot.
Rylan Clark-Neal
28
Really, I don’t care if people think I’m too skinny. This is my body. If they don’t like it, screw it.
Ellen Pompeo
29
At first blush, it seems odd that loser lit books are rejected initially, then go on to be fiercely loved by legions of readers. This apparent contradiction might be due to the fact that if they didn’t screw up their lives, most losers would be the kind of power-elite, Type A go-getters whom readers love to hate.
Kate Christensen
30
When my parents were divorced in the late ’70s, early ’80s, the climate was that you should screw over your ex as much as possible – get the worst lawyer in the world, all that. That’s not what people are out to do anymore. It feels cruddy to try and destroy each other just because you’re breaking up.
Michaela Watkins
31
There are some men who enter a woman’s life and screw it up forever.
Janet Evanovich
32
Also, I plan to screw something up on every movie I do so that I can learn from my mistakes and become a better director with each project.
Richard King
33
Cham is the only thing to screw one up when one is down a peg.
Anthony Trollope
34
We’ve been given the gift of a billion years of cosmic time, and we should not screw it up. But at the rate we’re using up our planet’s natural resources and fouling our own nest means we’re not going to last a billion years.
Sandra Faber
35
We should conceive of ourselves not as rulers of Earth, but as highly powerful, conscious stewards: The Earth is given to us in trust, and we can screw it up or make it work well and sustainably.
Kim Stanley Robinson
36
It’s not going to be easy; Enterprise IT has spent decades growing a defensive culture based on the premise that you only get noticed when you screw up, so that must be avoided at all costs.
Tim Bray
37
I normally don’t wake up until 1 P.M. and I’m not about to screw with my biorhythm.
Dan Bilzerian
38
‘Whiplash’ was always the song I hated the most because it’s a song designed to screw with drummers.
Damien Chazelle
39
It can kind of screw up things if you’re trying to overwork something.
Jeff Bridges
40
If what needs to get done is going to get done, then I can’t screw around with the luxury of writing rituals or waiting for pristine writing conditions to magically materialize.
Paul G. Tremblay
41
That’s why I want to screw with the abyss of technology, play God with science, so I can hop, skip and slide back and forth through time.
Goldie
42
Every time I’ve ever gotten close to being successful, I’ve found some way to screw it up.
Joe R. Lansdale
43
In our system of government, an opposition party doesn’t have the ability to pass legislation, but it has the ability to massively screw things up.
Alex Pareene
44
I just do what feels right. I think the great thing about getting to do what I do is that you can try out being a different person without having to screw up your life to do it.
Anna Paquin
45
When David Fincher called me up a few years ago and said, ‘Hey, I’d like you to score this film ‘The Social Network,’ I said, ‘I’m flattered, but I really don’t have any real experience scoring films, and I’d rather not screw it up on a high-profile project. And I like you and I don’t want to compromise our friendship.’
Trent Reznor
46
I always tell the fans, ‘Screw it! Like what you like. Listen to what you want.’ Insisting that one type of music is better than the next is snobbery, and I have no time for that. Check out all the music that’s out there. There’s great stuff you’re probably missing.
Corey Taylor
47
To be a stunt person you kind of have to have a screw loose like you do in wrestling.
Summer Rae
48
I’m astonished at how readily a great many people I know, young people, have accepted a reduced economic prospect and limited freedoms in any substantial sense, and basically traded them for being able to screw around online.
Jaron Lanier
49
I think once I fail enough as a dad, I’ll be looking for help wherever I can get it. I just need enough time to screw things up and then I’ll start looking to TV dads for advice.
Ty Burrell
50
A manager’s job is simple. For one hundred sixty-two games you try not to screw up all that smart stuff your organization did last December.
Earl Weaver
51
This life of ours, this is a wonderful life. If you can get through life like this and get away with it, hey that’s great. But it’s very predictable. There’s so many ways you can screw it up.
Paul Castellano
52
Any time I screw up I feel bad about it.
Stephen Gostkowski
53
It’s not the most normal life in the world, but I screw up plenty of times to be a normal teenager.
Mila Kunis
54
At the end of every season I look in the mirror and ask myself what can I do better? Where did I screw up this year?
J. J. Redick
55
I like to believe in the good in people. But we’re all going to screw up from time to time. It just happens. It really is how our best growth occurs.
Judy Smith
56
There are so many opportunities to make a bad decision in building a robot company on top of all the normal ways that entrepreneurs screw up that it is incredibly difficult to truly create value because it is so cost-sensitive.
Colin Angle
57
As an actor, you always think that whatever job you have is going to be your last. In some way, shape or form, you think you’re going to screw it up and you’re never going to work again.
Ian Somerhalder
58
It takes two to make a relationship, but only one to screw it up.
Nigel Lythgoe
59
Nixon was so crooked that he needed servants to help him screw his pants on every morning.
Hunter S. Thompson
60
Traditionally in crime fiction, women exist as a bedroom convenience or to screw up in order that the plot may progress. I wanted no part of that.
Ann Maxwell
61
If you think marriage is gonna be easy, don’t do it because when there are children involved, you screw up the rest of society.
Dennis DeYoung
62
And I laugh at myself when I screw things up, which happens all the time.
Henry Rollins
63
Some felt as if ‘Charlie Hebdo’ was obsessed with its ‘Screw Allah’ stance. It’s a sort of provocation that caused a lot of debates.
Patrick Chappatte
64
Music is the language of the heart, and conservatives always screw it up.
Glenn Beck
65
At the end of the day, what difference does it make if you made 10 films or 18 films? You made 10 films, but you had a great relationship with your kids, or at least you did your best not to screw them up irrevocably, or you made 18, and they don’t return your phone calls.
Jennifer Connelly
66
I knew I wanted to write novels, but I could not finish what I started. The closer I got, the more ways I’d find to screw it up.
Steven Pressfield
67
When you screw up in the ring, it’s so embarrassing. But the fans don’t know you screwed up unless you act like you just made a mistake.
Jake Roberts
68
I have too much respect for the characters I play to make them anything but as real as they can possibly be. I have a great deal of respect for all of them, otherwise I wouldn’t do them. And I don’t want to screw them by not portraying them honestly.
Kyra Sedgwick
69
We don’t have sources who are dissidents on other sources. Should they come forward, that would be a tricky situation for us. But we’re presumably acting in such a way that people feel morally compelled to continue our mission, not to screw it up.
Julian Assange
70
I like Pixie Sticks. Yeah, screw the middle man. Just a tube of sugar… I’d pour two of those in a big 12 ounce coke. And I’d go out to catechism class and try to concentrate on the priest. I saw Jesus several times. I swear I did.
Tim Allen
71
Young people can be disruptive and screw up classes. But even if they are being a pain in the arse it’s a cry for help – they don’t feel like they are being listened to.
Jamie Oliver
72
I feel my personality is richer than my bank account. So if I meet a girl, maybe first she just likes me because I’m rich. But then she’s gonna get to know me and say, ‘Screw the money.’
will.i.am
73
One good thing about animation is that, if you do screw up a line, they won’t use it. You can keep going until it’s right.
Jim Cummings
74
We were not allowed to say, Screw, but we could say, Hump the hostess, because hump is in Shakespeare.
Uta Hagen
75
I really enjoyed multicamera comedy. You film in front of a live audience, and it’s kind of the best of both worlds. It’s like doing a one-act play every week, but if you screw your lines up, you get to do it over.
Alan Ruck
76
I have only read very classic traditional English ghost stories, other than Henry James, who wrote some magnificent short ones as well as the longer ‘Turn of the Screw.’ He, Dickens, and M.R. James are my influences.
Susan Hill
77
When you screw with somebody’s sense of ownership of something, that’s when they react.
James Murray
78
I try to stay in line and not be a jerk. I’ve always been conscious that if I really screw up, people might notice.
Amanda Hearst
79
It’s like the Boy Scouts’ motto, be prepared. You’ve got to be ready when the moment is offered. If you’re not, you can actually screw it up for life.
Nigel Hawthorne
80
If you don’t have the confidence in baking, commit to making the recipe three times. The first two, do it exactly the way I’ve told you to make it. Twice. The first time you’ll screw it up. The second time it will come out pretty good, and then the third time, make your adjustments.
Tom Douglas
81
You can either look at things in a brutal, truthful way that’s depressing, or you can screw around and have fun.
David Spade
82
I admire people who just do the right thing, not looking to screw people up. I love all people.
Jessica Hahn
83
I grew up in an affluent suburban world and never worried about money until I’d grown up and found wonderfully original ways to screw up my life.
K. A. Applegate
84
Some people go to bed at night thinking, ‘That was a good day.’ I am one of those who worries and asks, ‘How did I screw up today?’
Tom Hanks
85
Sometimes if you jump into something too quickly, you can screw up something that might have been good two years down the road.
Dolly Parton
86
Adele shattered the image of how the stereotypical singer is supposed to look. She has that whole ‘Screw you, I’m awesome for what I do’ attitude, which I really look up to and want to be a part of.
Mary Lambert
87
Congresswomen are congresswomen – you are, sorry. And for women who want to be congressmen, there’s a screw loose in their head. I’m proud of being a woman. I think ‘congresswoman’ is the appropriate term, and ‘Madame chair’ is just fine with me.
Linda Sanchez
88
You know, you don’t need a leader to sort of administer something that’s going very well. In fact, in one sense, an overly ambitious person in that circumstance can probably screw it up.
Louis V. Gerstner, Jr.
89
The addict will screw you over and lie to you and do all kinds of things.
Daniel Baldwin
90
It’s a mood record. Like one night you’re going to be down in the dumps depressed because you’re thinking about your ex-boyfriend and the next moment you’re gonna be like screw him you know? And the next one you’re saying to yourself ‘God I’m in love.’
Willa Ford
91
Meeting my wife Amanda was the best thing that could ever have happened to me. She wasn’t going to let me screw around my life anymore, so I stopped drinking and started behaving like a decent human being.
Jason Bateman
92
Actors are always looking for actor-proof parts. A part so good you can’t screw it up!
John Rhys-Davies
93
You need a screwdriver for screws and a hammer for nails. Anybody that’s trying to screw in a nail with a screwdriver… that ain’t too smart.
apl.de.ap
94
This stammer got me a home in Beverly Hills, and I’m not about to screw with it now.
Bob Newhart
95
Want to be a well-paid bioethicist, with one, two, or even three university appointments? Just get yourself a two-piece navy polyester suit and follow these three simple rules: (1) Never name names. (2) Screw principles; just follow procedures. (3) Bury the money.
Alice Dreger
96
The decline of practical skills, some of them very day-to-day, among a generation of British men is very worrying. They can’t put up a shelf, wire a plug, countersink a screw, iron a shirt. They believe it’s endearing and cute to be useless, whereas I think it’s boring, and everyone’s getting sick of it.
James May
97
You know what, when you screw up in the ring, it’s so embarrassing.
Jake Roberts
98
A friend of mine once told me that I can’t screw up when I play my own music. I also take voice lessons, play other peoples’ songs out of music books, and occasionally figure out how to play other people’s music from records. This keeps my ears, fingers, and mind working.
Lisa Loeb
99
I think interventions tend to be wrong. That doesn’t mean to say that every intervention has been a disaster, but it does mean that generally they tend to screw up.
Kwasi Kwarteng
100
Miserable is a good thing, though. If you start the day miserable, nobody else can screw up your day.
Jake Roberts
101
My ex-boyfriend said, ‘You have a better chance of getting elected to Congress than getting on the staff of a television show.’ Which was the perfect thing for him to say, because my entire career is, ‘Well, screw you.’ And we broke up.
Jenji Kohan
102
I thought about tennis. But the more I thought about the whole thing – lessons, equipment, going to the courts – I said screw it, I’m just going to go buy a pair of sneakers and go running.
Biz Stone
103
There’s more flexibility in the cartoon world than there is in video games. In video games, if I tweak a line, I could screw up the work of countless other people with my whim.
Jennifer Hale
104
Powerful women often get concerned with this idea that they’re going to be seen in this unforgiving light. Screw that. It’s so old-fashioned… It’s so uninspired and actually really cowardly.
Scarlett Johansson
105
The core of Wikipedia is something people really believe in. That is too valuable for the world to screw it up.
Jimmy Wales
106
I don’t have a computer – I don’t like to get into it that much ’cause it can screw with your head a little.
James Marsters
107
It’s hard for me to be happy because I’m always worried about something going awry or what could happen to screw it up. It’s hard for me to sit and look around, going, ‘Ah, I’m really happy.’ I’m not that kind of person.
Lisa Marie Presley
108
You just make sure you don’t screw it up. It’s going to work as long as you don’t mess it up. Hopefully you have plenty of those moments in a big comedy.
Harold Ramis
109
You’re torn between wanting to fill in all the spaces and knowing that’s really going to screw up the screenplay. And yet, how are you going to communicate it to people who really don’t understand the process?
Robert Towne
110
I think it was at 16 when I forced myself because my dad had nagged me for an entire year. Like, ‘Come on, sing for people. You have a nice voice,’ and I just wouldn’t do it. One evening, I just decided, ‘Screw it, I’ll do it.’ I remember it was really bad. But I did it. So that was good.
Charlie Puth
111
We all assume that if you’re weak and poor, you’re never going to win. In fact, the real world is full of examples where the exact opposite happens, where the weak win and the strong screw up.
Malcolm Gladwell
112
Know that you’re gonna screw up, and be OK with it, and do better next time.
Kameron Hurley
113
I’m aware that what I say is going to reach a lot of people so I’m always very careful. But I’m human and I screw up – I’m not very good at saying things on the spot – so I’ll say something and go, ‘aw, man, I should have worded that better than I actually did.’
Carrie Hope Fletcher
114
As they say around the Texas Legislature, if you can’t drink their whiskey, screw their women, take their money, and vote against ’em anyway, you don’t belong in office.
Molly Ivins
115
I love Goody’s Spin Pins. They’re super cheap and look like corkscrews. You just gather your hair and screw them into a bun.
Christa Miller
116
General fiction is pretty much about ways that people get into problems and screw their lives up. Science fiction is about everything else.
Marvin Minsky
117
When you work with web design companies in San Francisco, you end up with a bunch of twenty-somethings who have their own cultural peculiarities, including obscurity for its own sake. You give those guys a website for a banking institution and they screw it up, because they are designing for themselves.
Brenda Laurel
118
Of course, screwed up families are not the exclusive province of the famous. Still, most families get to screw up in private.
Shawn Amos
119
I’m completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death.
George Carlin
120
I’d like to have a kid, but I’d probably get a Frank Sinatra Jr. instead of a Gilbert Gottfried Jr. I’d totally screw up like that.
Gilbert Gottfried
121
More than other subjects, there’s a myth that you have to be an absolute genius to be good at maths and to enjoy it, so I think it’s less accessible for people. Even the word ‘maths’ makes people screw their face up. They do the maths face.
Rachel Riley
122
I think it has sullied his presidency. As brilliant a politician as Bill Clinton is, as magnetic a personality as he can be, there is one little screw loose somewhere.
Morley Safer
123
Do your job. Do it the best you can. Do it right, because somebody, sometimes your best friend, is waiting for you to screw up so she can take your place.
Abby Lee Miller
124
People just expect you to show up, be a cartoon character of yourself, take your money and go home. But don’t screw up to the point where you’re gonna be out of the picture.
Jimmy Chamberlin
125
I’ve probably earned the right to screw up a few times. I don’t want the fear of failure to stop me from doing what I really care about.
Emma Watson